It was incredibly difficult for us to come to terms with the idea of medicating Car. In fact, we spent weeks in denial that she could really have ADHD and debating whether we should medicate her.
There is so much misinformation out there about ADHD and I'm embarrassed that I was a perpetrator of that. You know the stereotypes - ADHD is overdiagnosed, parents are medicating their kids because they want to control them, it's just kids being kids. You've probably heard some of the uninformed fears, too - we're hooking kids on stimulants, ADHD drugs are a gateway for other drugs, kids are getting diagnosed just so they can sell their drugs to other kids.
When conferences were held in October last year and we met with Car's kindergarten teacher, I already knew there were issues - she was bringing home work with comments like, "Had to complete during recess," "Didn't complete work, complete at home and return," and "Car had 20 minutes to complete this, have her complete it and return it to school." We were not surprised that her teacher expressed concerns, but we were taken aback with the seriousness with which she approached us.
If nothing else, her urgency prompted us to action. We knew there was a family history on both sides so we brought her to a doctor for an evaluation, but I don't think either of us really believed she had it. It took a few weeks to get all of the paperwork done and the evaluation complete and the doctor stated, bluntly and in no uncertain terms, that she had ADHD and we needed to medicate her.
It was hard to hear. We wanted to try other things. We were barely on board with an ADHD diagnosis - medicating our 5 year old was hard to swallow. I was sick all the way to the pharmacy. ADDDad was actually angry that I filled the prescription and not pushed harder for alternative treatments. We waited a week before trying the medicine.
I now have a year's experience with Car on medicine. It's not a cure-all for her - we still have up and down days. We've had to adjust the dosage a little as she's grown. I can tell you, though, that I KNOW it makes a difference for Car. Her teachers say they know if she's not on it without me telling them. At her doctor's recommendation, we have started giving it to her on weekends and we can see a huge difference. We now have a small dosage for evenings so she can focus during weekly cheerleading classes.
We have thankfully not experienced many side effects. Car has not had a problem with weight loss and she has generally tolerated the medication well, although occasionally we notice a burst of extreme hyperactivity in the evenings.
Long term, I don't know what the answer is. I would love for Car to be able to live without medication and I am afraid that by medicating her, we are not teaching her the skills she will need to do that. But I stop myself from those kinds of thoughts - as smart as Car is, she already needs help with reading and math so she doesn't fall behind her classmates. School moves so much faster these days and she had to be on medication right now to keep up.
The other practical reality that stops me? I've read the books and studied the websites on ADHD and all of them have great tips for getting through life with the disorder. The vast majority of those tips involve making lists, using a planner, and multiple other aids to memory and organization that require reading and writing. We're not there yet.
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