It was incredibly difficult for us to come to terms with the idea of medicating Car. In fact, we spent weeks in denial that she could really have ADHD and debating whether we should medicate her.
There is so much misinformation out there about ADHD and I'm embarrassed that I was a perpetrator of that. You know the stereotypes - ADHD is overdiagnosed, parents are medicating their kids because they want to control them, it's just kids being kids. You've probably heard some of the uninformed fears, too - we're hooking kids on stimulants, ADHD drugs are a gateway for other drugs, kids are getting diagnosed just so they can sell their drugs to other kids.
When conferences were held in October last year and we met with Car's kindergarten teacher, I already knew there were issues - she was bringing home work with comments like, "Had to complete during recess," "Didn't complete work, complete at home and return," and "Car had 20 minutes to complete this, have her complete it and return it to school." We were not surprised that her teacher expressed concerns, but we were taken aback with the seriousness with which she approached us.
If nothing else, her urgency prompted us to action. We knew there was a family history on both sides so we brought her to a doctor for an evaluation, but I don't think either of us really believed she had it. It took a few weeks to get all of the paperwork done and the evaluation complete and the doctor stated, bluntly and in no uncertain terms, that she had ADHD and we needed to medicate her.
It was hard to hear. We wanted to try other things. We were barely on board with an ADHD diagnosis - medicating our 5 year old was hard to swallow. I was sick all the way to the pharmacy. ADDDad was actually angry that I filled the prescription and not pushed harder for alternative treatments. We waited a week before trying the medicine.
I now have a year's experience with Car on medicine. It's not a cure-all for her - we still have up and down days. We've had to adjust the dosage a little as she's grown. I can tell you, though, that I KNOW it makes a difference for Car. Her teachers say they know if she's not on it without me telling them. At her doctor's recommendation, we have started giving it to her on weekends and we can see a huge difference. We now have a small dosage for evenings so she can focus during weekly cheerleading classes.
We have thankfully not experienced many side effects. Car has not had a problem with weight loss and she has generally tolerated the medication well, although occasionally we notice a burst of extreme hyperactivity in the evenings.
Long term, I don't know what the answer is. I would love for Car to be able to live without medication and I am afraid that by medicating her, we are not teaching her the skills she will need to do that. But I stop myself from those kinds of thoughts - as smart as Car is, she already needs help with reading and math so she doesn't fall behind her classmates. School moves so much faster these days and she had to be on medication right now to keep up.
The other practical reality that stops me? I've read the books and studied the websites on ADHD and all of them have great tips for getting through life with the disorder. The vast majority of those tips involve making lists, using a planner, and multiple other aids to memory and organization that require reading and writing. We're not there yet.
Showing posts with label Medical Concerns. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Medical Concerns. Show all posts
Tuesday, November 15, 2011
Wednesday, November 9, 2011
Adult Diagnosis, Part 2; or, The Medical Community Attempts to Weed Out the Drug Seekers by Screwing Over Everyone
So, this was initially one post, but this part got a little rant-y and I determined there's really a different message here. The "aha" moment where you realize you might have ADHD and that it might explain some of your struggles is poignant in its own way, kind of uplifting.
The rest is a fuster-cluck that will make you wish harder than you ever have that you could just be normal already. I actually cried at work.
I discussed the possibility of ADHD with my doctor a couple of weeks after reading the article at my annual physical and she gave me a referral to another doctor in the clinic that handled ADHD evaluations for adults. I was warned not to miss the appointment, that he would not reschedule if the evaluation was missed without a cancellation. I'm sure he's been stood up by Inattentive ADHD types before...
There was a SNAFU in scheduling my evaluation, of course. I thought I was so lucky to get an appointment just a week later, at 7 am Friday morning. Fantastic - I could be back to work before 9 and not have to take any time off! The day before, the nurse called and left me a message asking what I was being referred for (I was apparently referred for something else that had come up in my physical that I said I would take care of on my own, thank you very much). I left a message back that it was for an ADHD evaluation and drove in the next morning. The nurse explained when I got there that I could not be seen - evaluations are 80 minutes long and they only do them on Tuesdays and Thursdays at 3:20 pm. They could not squeeze me in.
She asked if I could wait until October - apparently there are a LOT of us getting evaluated and they were booked out until then. And then maybe she smelled the desperation because she began to offer me Friday afternoon at 3:20 the first week in September. No go, I had a pediatric opthomology appointment for our daughter Car (kid can't catch a break, I swear) that I was already waiting 5 weeks for. The following Friday? Nope - Scrapfest at MOA, for which my mom was flying in so we could spend the day together and we had already signed up and paid for classes. September 23? YES!
I went to the appointment shaking like a leaf. I was terrified the doctor would say I had ADHD. I was terrified he would say I didn't. He was really kind and walked through the whole test with me, discussing the questions and my answers rather than sitting me down with a piece of paper like it was the SAT. I tested VERY highly on the Inattention scale. I barely registered on the Hyperactivity scale.
A week or so later I spent several extremely painful days trying to schedule an appointment with someone who would prescribe meds for ADHD. Which is odd, because I have had NO problem finding a pediatrician (several, actually) to prescribe these same meds for my 6-year-old. I tried to get into a clinic specializing in family therapy for ADHD and other disorders, but they wanted me to retake the evaluation - 4 hours, over 3 appointments - and then wait another 3 months to see their in-house psychiatrist for a prescription. I finally have an appointment with a far inferior option - at the end of November, a full 7 weeks after I called to schedule. But I don't have to complete a new evaluation.
If you're considering an evaluation as an adult for ADHD, my advice is to get the ball rolling as soon as possible. As an adult, it's harder to find someone to evaluate you and it's excruciating to get an appointment with someone who is willing to prescribe a stimulant for you. Your primary doctor may be willing to maintain your prescription, but you will most likely have to get started with a psychiatrist and see them until you are stabilized on a prescription. It may take weeks or months to get an appointment with a psychiatrist after your evaluation.
But if the article I linked resonates with you, GO AND GET EVALUATED. You are not lazy, you are not a slob, you are not a terrible parent/spouse/housekeeper/friend/human. Your ADHD might look different from a man's, but it's just as difficult to deal with without some help and direction.
The rest is a fuster-cluck that will make you wish harder than you ever have that you could just be normal already. I actually cried at work.
I discussed the possibility of ADHD with my doctor a couple of weeks after reading the article at my annual physical and she gave me a referral to another doctor in the clinic that handled ADHD evaluations for adults. I was warned not to miss the appointment, that he would not reschedule if the evaluation was missed without a cancellation. I'm sure he's been stood up by Inattentive ADHD types before...
There was a SNAFU in scheduling my evaluation, of course. I thought I was so lucky to get an appointment just a week later, at 7 am Friday morning. Fantastic - I could be back to work before 9 and not have to take any time off! The day before, the nurse called and left me a message asking what I was being referred for (I was apparently referred for something else that had come up in my physical that I said I would take care of on my own, thank you very much). I left a message back that it was for an ADHD evaluation and drove in the next morning. The nurse explained when I got there that I could not be seen - evaluations are 80 minutes long and they only do them on Tuesdays and Thursdays at 3:20 pm. They could not squeeze me in.
She asked if I could wait until October - apparently there are a LOT of us getting evaluated and they were booked out until then. And then maybe she smelled the desperation because she began to offer me Friday afternoon at 3:20 the first week in September. No go, I had a pediatric opthomology appointment for our daughter Car (kid can't catch a break, I swear) that I was already waiting 5 weeks for. The following Friday? Nope - Scrapfest at MOA, for which my mom was flying in so we could spend the day together and we had already signed up and paid for classes. September 23? YES!
I went to the appointment shaking like a leaf. I was terrified the doctor would say I had ADHD. I was terrified he would say I didn't. He was really kind and walked through the whole test with me, discussing the questions and my answers rather than sitting me down with a piece of paper like it was the SAT. I tested VERY highly on the Inattention scale. I barely registered on the Hyperactivity scale.
A week or so later I spent several extremely painful days trying to schedule an appointment with someone who would prescribe meds for ADHD. Which is odd, because I have had NO problem finding a pediatrician (several, actually) to prescribe these same meds for my 6-year-old. I tried to get into a clinic specializing in family therapy for ADHD and other disorders, but they wanted me to retake the evaluation - 4 hours, over 3 appointments - and then wait another 3 months to see their in-house psychiatrist for a prescription. I finally have an appointment with a far inferior option - at the end of November, a full 7 weeks after I called to schedule. But I don't have to complete a new evaluation.
If you're considering an evaluation as an adult for ADHD, my advice is to get the ball rolling as soon as possible. As an adult, it's harder to find someone to evaluate you and it's excruciating to get an appointment with someone who is willing to prescribe a stimulant for you. Your primary doctor may be willing to maintain your prescription, but you will most likely have to get started with a psychiatrist and see them until you are stabilized on a prescription. It may take weeks or months to get an appointment with a psychiatrist after your evaluation.
But if the article I linked resonates with you, GO AND GET EVALUATED. You are not lazy, you are not a slob, you are not a terrible parent/spouse/housekeeper/friend/human. Your ADHD might look different from a man's, but it's just as difficult to deal with without some help and direction.
Adult Diagnosis, Part 1 - This is Really a Thing?
How did I know I had ADHD? I didn't.
Our daughter was diagnosed about a year ago with ADHD and, like the analytic dork I am, I started reading about the disorder and how to help her. My research informed me that there is a strong genetic component - diagnosed children usually have a parent or other family member with ADHD.
I looked immediately at my husband.
And we went on happily believing he was the carrier for nearly a year. I had thoughts on bad days that maybe I had it, but nothing more than a passing lament. Until my July copy of ADDitude magazine came in the mail.
July featured an article on ADHD in Women and Girls and it changed everything. ADHD in Women
Some of the things that resonated:
Our daughter was diagnosed about a year ago with ADHD and, like the analytic dork I am, I started reading about the disorder and how to help her. My research informed me that there is a strong genetic component - diagnosed children usually have a parent or other family member with ADHD.
I looked immediately at my husband.
And we went on happily believing he was the carrier for nearly a year. I had thoughts on bad days that maybe I had it, but nothing more than a passing lament. Until my July copy of ADDitude magazine came in the mail.
July featured an article on ADHD in Women and Girls and it changed everything. ADHD in Women
Some of the things that resonated:
- Inconsistent performance at work/school, including lots of small errors that "smart people" don't make, it appears as if they are sabotaging their own success
- Women with ADHD tend to report years of low self-confidence and psychological damage from turning the frustration inside. There is a high rate of depression and anxiety.
- Girls with ADHD tend to falter more when they lose the structure of school, rules, and routines and venture into early adulthood.
- When women with ADHD marry and have kids, they hit a "terrible wall of shame" because they are unable to perform the feats of memory and organization required today for child rearing.
Shortly before my brother died, we had discussed the possibility of him having ADHD and it seemed all but certain. But I didn't act like him, I wasn't hyperactive like him, I didn't have the impulse control issues or other traits that seemed to define his disordered actions. I never thought ADHD could look different.
It can. It does. To be continued...
It can. It does. To be continued...
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)